Thursday, May 30, 2013

12 Step Program For Gopher Football Fans

1.    We admitted that we were powerless over the futility of the Gopher football team – that our lives had become unmanageable.
2.    Came to believe that a Power greater than Glen Mason could restore the Gophers back to glory.
3.    Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of the College Football Gods as we understood them.
4.    Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of the Gopher football program.
5.    Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of the wrongs of the Gopher football program.
6.    Were entirely ready to have the College Football Gods remove these defects of character.
7.    Humbly asked the College Football Gods to remove these shortcomings.
8.    Made a list of all persons we had harmed after a difficult loss, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9.    Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or ourselves.
10.  Continued to take inventory of the program and when we were awful, promptly admitted it.
11.  Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with the College Football Gods as we understood them, praying only for knowledge of their will for the Gopher football program and the power to carry that out.
12.  Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to all suffering fan bases and to practice these principles in all our affairs.